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Writer's pictureAmy_Torres

Valentine's Day = Extra Sh*t, Hold the tp

Howdy there my peeps. It's been a good minute! Let me catch you up! I had been sick for-E-V-E-R and turns out I had a fallopian tube try to kill me! HA! Take that sucker, I won and you got removed!! I was off work for what felt like an eternity, but.... here I am!! Nevertheless, whilst I was dying from surgery and an organ being removed, my darling husband couldn't allow me to have my own moment. Oh no... He had to throw in there that he was needing to expel his ONLY kidney stone he's been carrying around since 2018! So, picture having pain like having had a c-section ladies and as I am getting up and down as if I just had a child removed from my womb...I'm trying to aid my husband who is screaming in agony and holding his left side (making me think he's having a heart attack) turns out after my MOTHER took him to the emergency room because let's face it... I couldn't even help myself let alone help him! Anywho, while checking in my husband tells my mother that hes having bad pain in his stomach, his back and in the tip of his penis. Turns out that he was in labor and going to be giving birth any time now. Yes folks, you read that right. My husband was birthing his precious kidney stone that he took 18 months to grow. LOL My poor mama is a saint and had to keep repeating these symptoms to all of the triage stations at Doctors Hospital because they felt the need to keep asking instead of reading the chart (who reads a medical chart anyways?! Duh?) So... They gave him good pain meds, sent him home and two days later he gave birth!! Hallelujah!


So as the Shitshow continues to unfold into a full on diarrhea fest.... Here's my events just in the last seven days! Last Saturday, I had an adventure happen with some weird guy at Starbucks... if you're my friend on FB go check that out. It's pretty hilarious. Anywho, I purchased a car from a major dealership and it's having issues and it's been at the dealership since 1/23/20 with a part that they are claiming is not covered. Then, while we were celebrating my parents' 37th wedding anniversary at a restaurant, we come out to find that my car that my parents drive is gone. I call 911 to report it stolen and BOOM! It's been repossessed! WTF?! I call finance company only to find that my account matured in November and I owe a balloon payment and in order to obtain the car, I need to pay it in full! HOLY CRAP!! Who has that kind of money laying around?? NONE of this was ever conveyed to me as I have been paying regularly. Moving on.... So I have been driving my husband's Tahoe and low and behold... the transmission went out yesterday with no warning. At this point I'm laughing. It's hilarious to me because this life is an adventure to say the least!! I'm counting my blessings that I did not have this happen to us when we were in Palm Springs!! So I own a suburban that needs a motor and a tranny, a tahoe that needs a tranny, a kia in the shop, a kia in a tow yard, and I can't drive a single damn one! This is so funny to me. Geez.... I just can't even believe these things that happen but I am cracking up because I choose to find the humor and gratitude through all of the craptastic things that happen. My husband and I both have work vehicles to get back and forth from work, and these are all minor things int he grand scheme of things as we have HEALTH and LOVE!!!


As I wrap this blog up, I'll say that Valentine's Day has NEVER been a good day for me. Maybe it's because I have been blessed with the best and so much love throughout every avenue of my life. I will take a lifetime of wonderful over one day of a commercial holiday every time! I have walked through the fire, stood covered in ashes, worn and tattered and my soul very tired, but I will ALWAYS SURVIVE! The Good Lord gives me strength and carries me over the hot coals when my feet can't bear them anymore. If you receive gifts from your loved ones today, appreciate them. Big, small or just in words...appreciate them. As for the holiday in general, I challenge you to think outside of the box and look really hard at you and your loved ones/significant other/spouse/children's relationships and really think of how it is that they convey their love and adoration for you. Is it small things like turning on the coffee pot in the morning? Is it waking the kids up and getting them ready so you can sleep a half hour longer? Is it waking you up with a gentle nudge and a kiss on your forehead or cheek to say goodbye before leaving for work? Is it working 6 days a week to make your children's extra curricular activities possible? Or is it meeting you in town to pace you home at night after hanging out with friends because the fog is so dense that visibility is low and your spouse knows you get claustrophobic in the fog? All of these are how my husband shows me he loves me every single day of the year. My life may be a full on shitshow! A full on presentation of theatrics that has developed into a magnificent Shitshow full of love, laughter, good and bad health, straight up comedy and a thousand moments that leave me scratching my head with a wtf expression, and for every wtf moment I am blessed 10 fold of moments that take my breath away at how amazing this shitshow is!! I am truly blessed. So... In short I will say this...God Please continue to bless this shitshow and as for you Cupid, you better cover your ass cuz I'm coming for ya Cabron!


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